Thursday, December 6, 2012

"Mommy, you're bossing."

There are just three of us here and it's close quarters so when things heat up, we all feel it pretty hot. And now, when the heat rises it's not uncommon to hear, "Mommy, stop bossing. You are bossing, Mommy."

It all started one evening when we were in the kitchen and Shane was washing dishes and I was putting the leftovers away. Shane said something like, "I don't want to give him two vitamins and I don't have to. I'm going to keep giving him one." And I said, "No... if you're going to GIVE the vitamins you will GIVE him two, because that's how many he needs at this age."

At this point we are facing each other and three-year-old Z comes running in between us saying, "Mommy. Mommy. Mommy!"


"You're bossing."

"Bossing? Where did you hear that word?"

"You're bossing. I will show you!" ...runs away and runs back... "See? It's right here. You're bossing."

And holds up this book...

...which had been read to him for the first time just that morning and quickly thrown aside.

My heart sunk. How is it that this little mind can learn a concept so quickly from a book and apply it to life, when it takes this bigger mind so much longer to unlearn it?

Bossing. Okay, yes, that's what it is. Thank you, little wise man, for pointing it out. And all I can think is, I don't care if I'm right, I don't want this child to learn that "bossing" is okay. Especially wife to husband. I am a miserable mess when it comes to this, but there is only one thing I can do about it now.

The vitamins take a back seat and I look down at the little one. "Yes, you are right. I am sorry for bossing Daddy. You let me know if I do it again, okay?"

Then I look up at the big one. "I'm sorry for bossing you around. Will you forgive me?"

Not because I'm really sorry but because I know I should be... and because it's more important for this child to know how to humble himself than to defend himself in an argument.

Maybe someday my heart will catch up with my head and I will feel more sorry?

Maybe God knew that having this mirror of a child was the only way I could learn his way.

1 comment:

Becky Scharnhorst said...

Totally understand where you are coming from on this one! Especially the part about wanting my heart to catch up with my head. I have often apologized for something while wishing I felt more sorry than my words indicated. Thanks for sharing!